I find it shocking how self-centred and ungrateful I can let myself get. I would like to describe myself as a hippy, a free spirit, as a person unfettered by the burdens of capitalism…. Imagine by John Lennon is my favourite song (Thank you to the director of the Closing Ceremony of the Olympics for bringing John & Freddie back to life 🙂 ) ….. but when I am ill, tired, hungry, lonely, angry or in pain… I forget all that & want want want!
On Friday, having been advised by the bank that they will charge me £10 to write me a cheque for my daughter’s Bus Pass I nearly started writing a blog there and then in the bank full of resentments about how it is always the poorest people in society who pay the most for things, such as electricity meters, pay as you go phones, monthly payment plans for insurances and appliances, older cars and their associated costs, banking services, postal orders etc…
Luckily for me it is not simple to publish a blog rant on my mobile phone (yet) and it has taken me until now to begin to compose it!
As I sat in bed last night, looking at my photos on my iPad of from the last few days of a family meal & the girls having fun on Peter’s boat last weekend I thought to myself “I really need to write gratitude lists more often!!!”
I have an amazing mattress, a really comfortable bed, in a lovely council house, in a really nice area, at affordable rent, a lovely camera which fits in my handbag (I want a DSLR which won’t) an 8 gb memory card, an iPad, 2 amazing daughters, a Peter, a Wilson (our beautiful cocker spaniel), a Lilly (my cat helping (?) me write this), a Myrtle (our Tortoise), and our Boat. And that’s a list generated from looking at just a few of my thousands of photos.
I don’t have a cheque book any more because I spent more money than I earn. (I have a dedicated album on Facebook of my favourite shoes!)
I am not in financial difficulties because teachers get paid badly or because my ex didn’t pay child maintenance, or because the government reduced tax credits thresholds hugely, or because I am not well enough to work full-time, or because my employer paid me late some months, or any other reason or person who i can come up with that I can add to the blame list for my current financial situation! No, I am broke because I overspent, and now I have to live with the consequences of that. (Throw shoes out of pram moment)
Now if I need a cheque the bank will charge me £10 for one. Not fair I cry! If I was rich I would have a cheque book & wouldn’t have to pay £10. This is true, most people in this country do have cheque books. Except those of us who mismanaged our money, or people a lot poorer than me.
I am rich. I have food.
When I got home and shared my rage at ‘The Machine’ with my husband, he suggested I give the people I need to pay a ring, and sure enough, (contrary to my protestations that they would not be able to help me), they were more than happy to accept payment for my daughters bus pass by Internet banking (which I have) and, they even saved me £25 as they told me I don’t need to get her an ID card to go with the bus pass, as I can use her Oyster Card as proof of age!
I find I owe the machine an apology, and want to thank Nicole at the bus company for being such an angel and rescuing my weekend!
I find I really need to eat some humble pie. And just in case I forgot to do it, my hero came back to life at the closing ceremony to remind me!
Here is a great video I found on You Tube. I hope it works!
PS And…. I am not in remission from Leukaemia because i don’t have Leukaemia, But my friend Dave does and thankfully is in remission 🙂 Please Sponsor him! http://www.justgiving.com/dave-adamson
PPS Have just found this great group ‘Bloggers for Peace‘ We hope someday you will join us……
Update August 2013
My friend Dave had a relapse of his Leukaemia and died on June 6th 2013. His family are keeping up his wordpress blog at http://daveadamson.wordpress.com
Lol, I had to ‘like’ my own post! The video worked & I love it 🙂
Sounds like you are now rich in gratitude, as well, Barbara. Bravo.
Thank you 🙂 I did feel better once I got my little petty problems into perspective!
I hate to say this, but realizing that misfortune is not somebody else’s fault is a capitalistic viewpoint. Maybe there is some hope for you. We’ll have to discuss this in our next lives.
The UK is the most socialist Capitalist country that there is! Sweden is more socialist but less capatilistic. I identify myself as socialist as opposed to communist, because I do believe in some capitalistic viewpoints, such as property ownership and salaries based on talent as opposed to a set scale. I also completely believe in taking responsibility for my own actions and their consequences, just sometimes I forget that….
Ps, did you watch the video?
Yes, I did. It is moving (how could it be otherwise with one of the best songs ever written) and really serves to illustrate something I fervently believe in. It is up to us, as individuals (or groups of individuals) to care for our fellow man. Left to our own devices we do a pretty good job of it. It’s when government becomes the controlling force of it all that things break down and money wasted or ill spent. Not to mention that oppressive governments are the cause of so much of the suffering in the first place. I have so much I want to say about all this but I want to keep you as a blog friend and not chase you away. Anyway, thanks for posting that video, I could listen to that song for days on end!
You won’t chase me away… I have read all your older posts and am still here 🙂
The way to peace is through intelligent discussion, the world would be a dreadfully boring place if we agreed on everything!!
The recipe for a happy marriage is to know when to ‘agree to disagree’ its also the recipe for friendship. On some things we will agree to disagree.
True enough. Anyone who could read all those vituperative postings and come back for more is a dedicated blog friend!
As for marriage I would add that compromise is also an important element. For example, over the years Patty and I have differed on whether to go to the mountains (my choice) or the beach (her choice) for vacations. We decided to compromise and go to the beach. It’s worked out well.
Lol, that type of compromise always works well. I usually go with Peter’s choice, as there is nothing worse than a moody Peter on holidays & I’m game to try anything once
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